Happy Birthday Tom

I was soo excited to do something fun for your Birthday, even if you are depressed about turning the big 30. But then life happens.

Your the best.

 I Love You.

Sorry Today might not be filled with Yummy food, Ping Pong, Surfing ;), or a party but I know you understand and don't care.
Happy Birthday Babe!

Pray For My Mom

This is hard.
My Mom is really sick.
She has been in the hospital since Monday.
Tomorrow she has major surgery to hopefully fix the problem.
They are not sure but they think she has Ovarian Cancer.
The doctors are really optimistic that they can remove most or all of the tumors with surgery.
She will stay at Huntsman until she can come home which is another week possibly.
I am bringing her to my house after.
She will start Chemo 6 weeks post surgery.
She will lose her hair. She did not care. I told her I would shave mine too.
Everything could change once they open her up and find out what is really inside her.
She is so beautiful even with all the crap they have hooked up to her.
She still is laughing, when her Morphine is good.
She has had sleepovers with Stacey, Andrea, and Grandma to keep the nurses on top of her favorite thing right now Morphine.
She told me she feels at peace.
My sister and I rubbed her feet last night and I think that was the first time she has felt anything good in a really long time.
She told me she is going to fight this.
I told her I wish I could do it for her.
She is not even 60 years old.

Please pray for my mom, we need all the prayers we can get.

Sorry about the format. It is the only way I could get through the post. I am having a really hard time focusing on anything.

MOM I LOVE YOU!!!

Thankful For....

Day 25.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I went back and read the past 24 posts to see what I have missed. I just have to say that this has been a wonderful experience for me to reflect on what I am  thankful for and, it has really made me understand how blessed my life is in so many ways. Sometimes I think if I had this and this then I would be truly happy. But now I can see that I have everything I need and the rest that is added to my life is a bonus.

I did have some great moments, or should I say oh crap moments when I would say I don't even want to write about anything today because life sucks right now.

I remember screaming at my children and threatening to throw them out in the snow. 

This is the hardest thing for me.

Raising children is crazy hard.

I don't think I have a day where I don't think I am screwing all three of these wonderful children up. Someone else really could do better. I have serious moments where I want to run away from life just so it can be easy again. After having all these feelings of madness in my head, I think about it at the end of the day when all the kids are asleep and feel unworthy of this job as a mother.

I pray for strength every night that I can make good choices for my children, and be a good example for them, but I still am noticing things that I hate about myself in my children.

Tempers, sarcasm, and the rolling of the eyes to name a few.

 Every day is a challenge and sometimes I am on top and feel good about the world, and sometimes I want to throw in the towel because I failed. My goal this month was to be thankful, and I have noticed that my children and me are really making and effort to notice our blessings and give thanks for them. I feel blessed to have the opportunity to live the next day and do better. I want to do better for my children, husband, and me so our home can be a happy home not filled with anger or sadness but a home filled with a calm spirit.

Thankful For....

Day 24.

I am Thankful for these three doing all the work this morning! This shoveling thing is new to us so I imagine it is going to be a long winter.

Yes Tom is in shorts. Crazy!!

Thankful For....

Day 23.

I am thankful for a wonderful trip to the coldest place on the planet (probably not the coldest but we thought it might be close). I was STRESSED about taking Bronson on an airplane while he was sick and then cart him around Minnesota while we did fun exciting things. He was amazing. I will say it again he was amazing. I am so grateful that he made my life so wonderful while we there. I was able to enjoy the trip with him, and that made both Tom and I so happy! I am sure that all our PEOPLE"s were happy too, since we were all on the same plane, same car, same hotel, OK you get the point. What we did the most in Minnesota...

1. Went to the Mall of America 4 times.

2. Went out to eat a lot!

3. Adopted a new family member. You may know him as KC Clyde but now he is KC Clyde Schriever!!

4. Saw 2 of the 10,000 lakes in Minnesota

5. Saw and drove over the Mississippi (no spell check needed for Mississippi)

6. Went to Koby and Emily's wedding or Sealing in the Temple

We had so much fun with all the friends, I can't remember the last time that I have laughed that much in 5 days all together. Thanks to all are awesome friends for being so helpful at the airport, restaurants, car rides, and pretty much everywhere we went. Bronson had 7 dads, and 3 moms for the trip! He was one entertained dude!

Thankful For...

Day 22.

Thankful for funny things that kids do that make you run in your house and grab your camera and pray that they did not hear you so that you can get the shot of them doing something so funny your belly hurts. This is what Celeste and I saw when we went out to grab the kids. We were laughing so hard because we thought Ty was tying Sophie up, which would sum Ty up perfectly!

But that was not the case.

It gets even funnier.

Ty was doing Sophie's hair and making it pretty with these cords. I love love these two. They are so funny together!

FYI: These two are like an old married couple, they love each other one second but the next minute they are fist fighting. But always entertaining!

Thankful For...

Day 21.

I am Thankful for sleeping Children.

These two never do this.

Maybe it is the nice soft couch, or, maybe it was because both of them were not feeling well.

I think it was the latter of the two. But I still love my house when everyone takes a nap. It is peaceful and quiet! And if it only lasts for an hour I still am thankful for the respite.

Thankful For....

Day 20.

I am thankful for this new bathroom.

It is all new,

which is nice in an old house.

Slowly all the rooms will feel like this to me.

Still needs a door, but we use it anyways!

Thankful For...

Day 19.

I am Thankful for an organized and pretty clean garage. We had been throwing everything in the garage after the move to get it out of the way. It made Tom nuts so he did something about it. He built overhead shelves that are awesome, he took all the cabinets that were in the basement and made himself a work area, and he organized everything and labeled it.

How nice! 

He never stops working! Tom also built the new stairs to the door since we moved the door to enter into the kitchen rather than the Family room. Oh, Tom did all that too! He is amazing. 

Do you think I like him a little:)

Now we just need Ben and Matt to finish the removal of the old stairs,

but I bet Tom will do it!

Thankful For...

Day 17.

 I am thankful for this little man. I took all these pictures within 30 seconds and man did he give me variety!! He makes me smile.